I'll see you in the ICU!

Sigh...

the hardest thing about this switching to night life is saying goodnight to my hubby and pooch as they sleepily head off to bed, and I know I have a long night of internet, baking, television (at low volume) and so on.

I think I'm blogging more because it's company...I dunno.

Mostly, I think I'm using it as a sounding board to see what it is I really think. Sometimes, I can't see the forest for the trees. Ironically, the word of the day is algorhithm. I've been thinking in algorithms lately. If this, then that. If I stay at this ICU and I return to New York, will I be ready? If no, return home. If I get an offer of a residency at UCSF and I take it, then I obligate myself to one year's service to them, then do I take it and sacrifice my place at Columbia? IF I do that, THEN do I reapply? Who will I get to write my reference letters? WHICH schools will I apply to? SHOULD I just change majors and do something I don't really want to do, but it's better than what I'm doing now? I could get 2/3 tuition reduction if I attend UCSF, but I can't see myself doing acute care NP or Cardiology NP...still, it's better than the fatigue of bedside care--that's killing me.

Sheesh.

This is what rolls around my brain like a marble.

posted by sketchmonkey @ 12:05 AM